Revival of the IRC Quotes

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Postby Sage Of The Wise » Sat Mar 18, 2006 5:49 pm

Maby that was funny, maby it wasnt, but its way to big to fit in the attention span of this forum.
And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
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Postby Forerunner » Sun Mar 19, 2006 6:45 am

Yeah, I tried to read it bout 30 seconds ago and all I recall is MONKEYSTICK.

That and Teen likes taco's or something.
Black-Cat wrote:Only the ones with egos made of steel can withstand the scourge of emotional deterioration often referred to as "having no life".
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Postby Strayed Wanderer » Mon May 15, 2006 8:46 pm

<OoS> Develop a language using erotic images as letters.
<OoS> Then fill the text bubbles with that.
<OoS> It's brilliant.
<Ghoti> Like this
<Ghoti> Oh wait
<Strayed> It's hard to do that without using a lot of penises.
<Ghoti> Penises are an important part of porn
<Strayed> and I have no interest in satisfying homosexual men and heterosexual women.
<Ghoti> Especially when one of the girls has one
<Strayed> ... like 90% of doujins.
<Ghoti> That's why doujins are awesome
<Ghoti> I love my dickgirls
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Postby Sarcasm » Mon May 29, 2006 6:04 pm

<Fitz> And I am also the best one here again.
<Fitz> Bar Verb and Inari of course.
<inari-chan> What are we barring me from?
<Fitz> I am the best, bar you and verb.
<Ghoti> The best at what?
<Fitz> Everything.
<Ghoti> Everything?
<Ghoti> Even gay sex?
<Fitz> Everything
1,000,000,672+1D4 Bludgeoning to the face, bitch!
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Postby Ghoti » Fri Jun 02, 2006 8:39 am

Loneliness. Emptiness. Despair. Not even words as strong as these are capable of describing the feelings which travelled through me sitting there alone in the dark, stygian expanse of our very own IRC channel. It would horrify even the bravest of warriors to learn exactly what could occur when one man, one nick, is left in such a place all alone.

With that, I offer you the fruits of my boredom, since, otherwise, noone other than myself would ever read the goddamned thing. So, here it is.

[08:48] <iamtheverb> ghoti, I'm afraid I might have to leave you all alone in here
[08:51] <Ghoti> No!!
[08:51] <Ghoti> You can't do that!
[08:51] <Ghoti> Please
[08:51] <Ghoti> I'll be sooo lonely
[08:51] <iamtheverb> be strong
[08:52] <iamtheverb> I know you can make it through this
[08:52] <Ghoti> :'(
[08:52] <Ghoti> You aren't *really* going to leave me here alone, are you? :(
[08:53] <iamtheverb> PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER
[08:54] <Ghoti> ;lhbn[aer
[08:54] * Ghoti pulls hard.
[08:55] <iamtheverb> to paraphrase edward r. murrow: good morning, and good luck
[08:55] * iamtheverb has quit IRC (Quit: )
[08:56] <Ghoti> ...
[08:56] <Ghoti> Wow
[08:57] <Ghoti> So this is what it feels like to be alone.

As time passed, I began to grow more and more lonely. Emptiness and despair gradually began to fill my soul. I felt there was no hope left.

Then suddenly, a miracle occured!

[09:15] * Ponderosa has joined #theway
[09:16] * MegaJuJu has joined #theway

I was filled with more glee than I ever had been. These two wonderful strangers, presumably angels descended from heaven, appeared magnificently before me. However, a strange feeling crossed me. It felt as if I knew these people. It felt as if they were... a part of me.

[09:16] <Ghoti> Ah...
[09:16] <Ghoti> That feels much better.
[09:16] <Ghoti> Now I feel much less lonely.
[09:17] <MegaJuJu> stfu dickweed
[09:17] <Ghoti> Now now, MJ
[09:17] <Ghoti> Play nice

Wait! Wait one cotton-pickin' minute! How the hell am I acting so chummy with this person I've never even met before?

[09:17] <Ponderosa> Yes
[09:17] <Ponderosa> Listen to the man
[09:17] <MegaJuJu> ah fuck you guys your full of shit
[09:18] <Ghoti> So, how've you been Ponde?
[09:18] <Ponderosa> Not too well, actually.
[09:18] <Ponderosa> My dog died last week, as I told you before.
[09:19] <Ghoti> Oh yeah, I remember that.
[09:19] <Ghoti> Sorry for the loss.
[09:19] <Ponderosa> Yeah, well, everyone dies eventually.
[09:19] <Ghoti> I guess so.
[09:19] <MegaJuJu> dude your so pussy still depressed over a dead dog HAHAHAHAHA
[09:19] <Ghoti> MJ!
[09:20] <Ponderosa> It's okay
[09:20] <Ponderosa> He's right, anyway
[09:20] <Ponderosa> It's just a dog
[09:20] <MegaJuJu> pssshhh
[09:20] <MegaJuJu> fuck you pieces of shit
[09:21] <MegaJuJu> im outa here
[09:21] * MegaJuJu has left #theway

How in the nine blazing hells...

[09:21] <Ghoti> I guess it's just you and me now, Ponde
[09:21] <Ponderosa> ...
[09:21] <Ponderosa> Don't you think of doing anything nasty, you hermaphroditic pervert.
[09:22] <Ghoti> What?
[09:22] <Ghoti> ...
[09:22] <Ghoti> You know I'm not like that.
[09:22] <Ponderosa> Oh...
[09:22] <Ponderosa> I've seen your pictures
[09:23] <Ponderosa> They're all over your webpage
[09:23] <Ponderosa> You do some of the nastiest things I've ever seen
[09:23] <Ghoti> Ponde...
[09:23] <Ghoti> It's not like that...
[09:23] <Ponderosa> Urinating on women...
[09:24] <Ponderosa> That's just sickening

I was immensely baffled. I had never once performed an act so degrading in all my years. I simply didn't know what to think. I just replied impulsively.

[09:24] <Ghoti> Well, hey
[09:24] <Ghoti> You know I have weird fetishes

I was disgusted with myself. I couldn't believe I had ever said such an abominable thing.

[09:24] <Ponderosa> Fuck you
[09:25] <Ponderosa> I hope you die
[09:25] <Ghoti> You're starting to sound worse than MJ, Ponde...
[09:25] <Ponderosa> You deserve
[09:25] <Ponderosa> it
[09:27] <Ponderosa> I'm leaving you all to yourself now
[09:27] <Ponderosa> You don't deserve my company
[09:27] * Ponderosa has left #theway

And there I was, alone again. Sitting there alone in the dark, stygian expanse of our very own IRC channel. What was the wonderment which had just then occurred? Unfortunately, I will only be left to wonder. Wonder whether I had lost the verisimilitude of my reality... or simply my sanity.

[09:27] <Ghoti> ...
[09:27] <Ghoti> And then there was one.
[09:28] <Ghoti> Dear lord, I hope verb gets back soon.

...

IT'S YOUR FAULT I PUT THIS PIECE OF SHIT TOGETHER, VERB! :(

Please, someone come in the channel with me. :( It's so lonely... :(
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Postby Strayed Wanderer » Fri Jun 02, 2006 11:11 am

You amuse me.
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Postby Teenr0cker » Fri Jun 02, 2006 6:49 pm

TELL me you pinged them and checked to see if they were the same person.
Sage Of The Wise wrote:This sounds like the beginning of a sitcom. Think about it: "Coming this fall to Fox, Ralphie and the Hooker".
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Postby Inderos » Sat Jun 03, 2006 3:30 am

Strayed Wanderer wrote:<OoS> Develop a language using erotic images as letters.
<OoS> Then fill the text bubbles with that.
<OoS> It's brilliant.
<Ghoti> Like this
<Ghoti> Oh wait
<Strayed> It's hard to do that without using a lot of penises.
<Ghoti> Penises are an important part of porn
<Strayed> and I have no interest in satisfying homosexual men and heterosexual women.
<Ghoti> Especially when one of the girls has one
<Strayed> ... like 90% of doujins.
<Ghoti> That's why doujins are awesome
<Ghoti> I love my dickgirls



Hold on....


....


....


...No interest satisfying heterosexual women?
I'll say I found her floating face down and I won't let them hurt you, I swear, from the crystal to the crucifix, I will always be with you. So if I go to hell for this I guess I'll meet you there.
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Postby Teenr0cker » Sat Jun 03, 2006 4:23 am

His basis for that statement was totally taken out of context. Yes, you did put the quote up, but you only used that one line as your arguement. Strayed stated he refuses to please homosexual men and heterosexual women for the same reason I would turn down a MMF 3-some...In our own world, I think the wang we should be most comfortable being around is our own...the one wang to rule them all, each man his own. Last I checked, girls like the wang, so it only seems natural that he'd not want to please them by drawing a lot of wangs, mainly because he doesn't care to make a deck full of gay-oriented cards. In fact, he proves his hetrosexuality because he disdains from serving women, thus implying he'd rather focus on his interests, which is obviously the pussy. If I heard a guy say "I want to draw a wang to appeal to girls mainly", I'd tell them they're a fag. Guys should obviously want to please themselves before pleasing anyone else (self-centered? Strayed? Yup), so his arguement sounds right. Get what I mean?
Sage Of The Wise wrote:This sounds like the beginning of a sitcom. Think about it: "Coming this fall to Fox, Ralphie and the Hooker".
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Postby ReaperGal » Sat Jun 03, 2006 8:40 am

Teenr0cker wrote:Last I checked, girls like the wang,


Occasionally.
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Postby Ghoti » Sat Jun 03, 2006 7:58 pm

A witty conversation about wit (warning: long):

[19:10] <Ghoti> ...
[19:10] <Ghoti> The blade that is my wit really needs some sharpening.
[19:10] <Ghoti> Anyone know of any wit blacksmiths?
[19:10] <Ghoti> Preferable inexpensive.
[19:10] <Ghoti> *preferably
[19:12] <Fitz> It's an art that each learns for themselves! You can't merely TEACH wit!
[19:13] <Fitz> That's crazy.
[19:13] <Ghoti> Ah, so it is something you gaint through experience, then?
[19:13] <Ghoti> *gain
[19:13] <Ghoti> I see.
[19:14] <Fitz> Yeah.
[19:15] <Teenr0cker> or osmosis
[19:15] <Teenr0cker> so just....Dont' touch war
[19:15] <Fitz> Wit through osmosis. It could work...
[19:15] <Ghoti> B-but...
[19:15] <Ghoti> He's just too cute...
[19:15] <Fitz> ...?
[19:15] <Ghoti> War
[19:15] <Fitz> ...
[19:15] <Fitz> ?
[19:15] * Teenr0cker beats Ghoti repeatedly with a rolled up newspaper
[19:16] <Teenr0cker> NO!
[19:16] <Teenr0cker> BAD!
[19:16] <Ghoti> :'(
[19:16] <Ghoti> Sorry, master
[19:16] <Teenr0cker> *regret*
[19:16] <Ghoti> You *are* the master.
[19:16] <Ghoti> Teach me your witty ways.
[19:16] <Teenr0cker> okay...
[19:17] <Fitz> Oh gee fine! Completely ignore what I just said then...
[19:17] <Teenr0cker> I never ignore you fitz
[19:17] <Teenr0cker> see
[19:17] * WarV touchs Ghoti
[19:17] <Teenr0cker> War lacks wit
[19:17] <Ghoti> :o
[19:17] <Fitz> I was talking about him... ^^^
[19:17] <Ghoti> It touched me!
[19:17] <Teenr0cker> so its like...unlearning wit via osmosis
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> Get him to an e-vac center!
[19:18] <Fitz> Does that mean War gets witty?
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> No
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> its like anti matter
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> it doesn't gain matter
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> it just creates a lack therof
[19:18] <Fitz> So it's not War absorbing wit, it's Ghoti absorbing Anti-wit.
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> yeah
[19:18] <Ghoti> Huh
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> because wit is creatable without any other matter
[19:18] <WarV> THERE IS SUGAR ON MY HANDS!
[19:18] <Ghoti> The physics of wit sure is interesting
[19:18] <Teenr0cker> wit can be created or destroyed
[19:19] <Fitz> Yeah, it's unlike energy like that.
[19:19] <Teenr0cker> and mass
[19:19] <Teenr0cker> which is technically another form of energy
[19:20] * Ghoti writes all this down.
[19:20] <Ghoti> Fascinating
[19:20] <Teenr0cker> Oh, the sugar is from touching ghoti...he keeps it to lure young children
[19:20] <Fitz> Yeah, but with there has to be some sort of equilibrium surely?
[19:20] <Teenr0cker> like bees to honey
[19:20] <Teenr0cker> surely
[19:20] <Teenr0cker> that would be verb
[19:20] <Teenr0cker> he just...IS...
[19:21] <Fitz> For all wit there has to be an equal amount of anti-wit or something.
[19:21] <Teenr0cker> he has wit, and sometimes when his wit is most needed he is not witty
[19:21] <Teenr0cker> oh laws of wit?
[19:21] <Fitz> Yeah.
[19:21] <Fitz> Not like a state of mind of equal wit.
[19:22] <Teenr0cker> I believe that for every bit of wit one gains, another personifaction of anti-wit grows stronger
[19:22] <Fitz> Though if there was somebody with that state of mind, it would be Verb.
[19:22] <Teenr0cker> See, wit is wasted on the stupid
[19:22] <Teenr0cker> the anti-wits
[19:22] <Teenr0cker> so in the end, all the wit is gone and so is the anti-wit, therefore
[19:22] <Teenr0cker> because you cannot be the opposite of something that does not exist
[19:23] <Fitz> But if it weren't for those *cough* noble people sacrifising their lives for anti-wit, then there wouldn't be wit.
[19:23] <Teenr0cker> not exactly
[19:23] <Fitz> Hmm?
[19:24] <Teenr0cker> see it is like when there is light
[19:24] <Teenr0cker> upon an object, the object is lit up, making it witty
[19:24] <Teenr0cker> however, there is an umbra created behind it
[19:24] <Teenr0cker> that could be antiwit
[19:25] <Fitz> So all those with anti-wit are just a shadow of those with wit?
[19:25] <Teenr0cker> however, light physics show us that with enough ambient light, the amount of shadows or umbra can be reduced to such a negligable size
[19:25] <Teenr0cker> yes
[19:25] <Ghoti> Wow
[19:25] <Fitz> What would be the source of such wit-light, if taking into account that wit is regardless of energy.
[19:26] <Teenr0cker> such wit light lives in all of the witty
[19:26] <Teenr0cker> it is the inspiration of man
[19:26] <Teenr0cker> the divine spark of life many refer to is really the spark of wit
[19:26] <Teenr0cker> we all have it in the beginning
[19:26] <Fitz> The big bang of wit.
[19:26] <WarV> Or you can think of wit as a character attribute and it doesn't really have a physical form at all. Like good and evil. Nothing is good, nothing is evil. Its just a point of view.
[19:26] <Teenr0cker> I just chose to nourish my wit
[19:27] <Fitz> No War.
[19:27] <Fitz> That's just silly.
[19:27] <Ghoti> Indeed
[19:27] <Teenr0cker> Oh!
[19:27] <Teenr0cker> *wit-gasm*
[19:27] <Teenr0cker> nice Fitz
[19:27] <Teenr0cker> we should call you....Witz
[19:27] <Teenr0cker> bwahahaha
[19:28] <Fitz> We should write a book.
[19:29] <Ghoti> I'd totally read it.
[19:29] <Fitz> We'd be rich/
[19:30] <Teenr0cker> yeah
[19:30] <Teenr0cker> me and porter are working on a book actually
[19:31] <Teenr0cker> I'm personally doing the section called "Art of War"
[19:31] <Teenr0cker> where I take war quotes and ridicule him in mspaint
[19:31] <Teenr0cker> so its nothing new
[19:31] <WarV> Thats just mean =/
[19:32] <Teenr0cker> mean...or WITTY
[19:32] <WarV> No mean.
[19:32] <Teenr0cker> shut up, Fatty McWitless
[19:32] <Fitz> It's going to be a big book...
[19:32] <Teenr0cker> oh, we're getting it leatherbound too
[19:33] <Teenr0cker> it's my summer projecyt
[19:33] <Teenr0cker> gah, damn popup warnings
[19:36] <Teenr0cker> strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words...
[19:38] <WarV> Is he killing you softy with his words?
[19:38] <Teenr0cker> No, why the fuck would he kill me with verbal messages?
[19:38] <Teenr0cker> Fag
[19:38] <Teenr0cker> Admit it, you set that one up
[19:38] <Fitz> Walked right into it.
[19:38] <WarV> ummmm not really.....
[19:39] <Teenr0cker> Yes, yes you did
[19:39] <Teenr0cker> I guess he enjoys proving how anti-wit he is
[19:39] <WarV> It was more like I said something..... and you made a random remake about me being gay....
[19:39] * inari`maplestory is now known as inari-chan
[19:39] <Teenr0cker> a random....remake...
[19:40] <Teenr0cker> keep your distance from War Inari, he's on fire today
[19:40] <Teenr0cker> Ah, that's a new discovery
[19:40] <Fitz> Not to mention the implied stupidity.
[19:40] <Teenr0cker> it seems anti-wit is flammable
[19:40] <Teenr0cker> Which makes perfect sense
[19:40] <inari-chan> i don't care if he's on fire
[19:40] <inari-chan> nekkidness counters fire
[19:40] <Teenr0cker> hawt
[19:41] <Fitz> Burning flesh?
[19:41] <inari-chan> they're like, the fourth and fifth elements to rock paper scissors.
[19:41] <Fitz> <Sexual Innuendo>
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Gasp!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Fifth element!
[19:41] <Fitz> Love?
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> No!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Bewbs!
[19:41] <Fitz> Wit?
[19:41] <Fitz> Oh..
[19:41] <Fitz> Cool!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Wit is the 6th
[19:41] <inari-chan> boobswhere?
[19:41] <Fitz> Look down.
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> uhh....in my pants?
[19:41] <inari-chan> !
[19:41] <inari-chan> woah!
[19:42] <inari-chan> where did those come from!
[19:42] <Fitz> Then slightly left, then slightly right.
[19:42] <Teenr0cker> hmmm
[19:42] <Teenr0cker> Maybe wit is heavily associated with boobs
[19:42] <Teenr0cker> if only wit affected boob size
[19:42] <Teenr0cker> the world would be a better place
[19:42] <inari-chan> it does
[19:42] <inari-chan> that's why i have big boobs. >_>
[19:42] <Teenr0cker> of course
[19:43] <Teenr0cker> it makes perfect sense
[19:43] <Fitz> What the hell do boob implants do to the Wit balance?
[19:43] <Teenr0cker> not implants
[19:43] <Teenr0cker> just natural biochemistry
[19:44] <Teenr0cker> there's a gland in the brain fluctuates from person to person, based on wit
[19:44] <Fitz> Hmmm, if we could manipulate a concept such as wit through the physical world...
[19:44] <Teenr0cker> it affects the hormones in women
[19:44] <Teenr0cker> and their boobs
[19:44] <Fitz> Men?
[19:45] <Teenr0cker> Men....well where do you think?
[19:45] <Fitz> Or is it the obvious one?
[19:45] <Fitz> ... it is...
[19:45] <Teenr0cker> more like the obvious 3
[19:45] <Teenr0cker> lefty, righty, and trouser snake
[19:45] <Fitz> Well, I suppose...
[19:46] <Teenr0cker> That means my being diagnosed with minor elephantitus is simply my excessive wit
[19:46] <Teenr0cker> if I don't get enough wit out of my system, I'll need new pants
[19:46] <Fitz> Assuming that it is definatly not inversely proportional to my wit (Due to my complete sexual security an' all) can we assume War has a vagina?
[19:48] <Teenr0cker> hmm
[19:48] <Teenr0cker> thats an interesting theory
[19:48] <Fitz> In which case the pivital point of wit/anti-wit, would be x=0 where X is wit and Y is size.
[19:49] <Teenr0cker> but as we all know, he's more enitrely a pussy than an acutual person
[19:49] <Teenr0cker> quite
[19:49] <Fitz> In which case we can then assume that those in Wit Equalibrium are like those angels in Dogma.
[19:49] <Fitz> Hence: Verb is an angel.
[19:49] <Teenr0cker> A fallen angel
[19:49] <Fitz> That's proof right there.
[19:49] <Teenr0cker> A one-winged angel, perhaps
[19:50] <Teenr0cker> totally badass too
[19:50] <Fitz> Well obviously.
[19:50] <inari-chan> Mes ailes sont cassees.
[19:50] <Teenr0cker> verb dont need no flaming sword
[19:50] <Teenr0cker> wtf robyn?
[19:50] <Fitz> Her something is something.
[19:50] <inari-chan> >_>
[19:51] <Fitz> I'm going to pass French!
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> I'm not!
[19:51] <inari-chan> You said one-winged angels.
[19:51] <inari-chan> That reminded me of my aim name.
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> which is...
[19:51] <inari-chan> MesAilesCassees
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> what in english?
[19:51] <inari-chan> My broken wings
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> oh
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> well that was a sephiroth reference
[19:51] <Teenr0cker> but kay
[19:52] <Fitz> Thanks for the info.
[19:52] <Teenr0cker> hmm
[19:52] <Teenr0cker> on the matter of making postulates and estimates and such
[19:52] <Teenr0cker> can one surmise that I made Tele sexy?
[19:53] <inari-chan> brb, i have to put on panties and pants and a shirt and go downstairs
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> naw
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> dont do that
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> :D
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> so yeah, we know he was meal before I came in
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> which means that once I came in, he became sexyphalsion
[19:53] <Teenr0cker> which furthers my hypothesis of the abilities of wit
[19:54] <Teenr0cker> perhaps I physically altered the libido of Tele by simply being there, like an intrinsic effect
[19:55] <Fitz> Given Tele's previous sexiness it's hard to dispute... though in particular, is it just our particular area that effects the realm of our wit or our sexiness as a whole?
[19:55] <Teenr0cker> hmm, I might have been the intial starter
[19:55] <Teenr0cker> perhaps he just needed to reach a sexiness requirement and I was the final push
[19:56] <Fitz> A catalyst of sexiness, if you will.
[19:56] <Teenr0cker> yes, a catalyst was the word I was thinking of
[19:56] <Teenr0cker> this supports the wit additive theory
[19:56] <Teenr0cker> that one can accumulate amounts of wit
[19:57] <Fitz> Theoretically, Tele should be wittier now than he was before.
[19:57] <Teenr0cker> even if it is the same kind of wit, if you were to duplicate that wit and add it to your collection, you'd have doubled your wit amount
[19:57] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[19:57] <Teenr0cker> In fact, I think Tele's out being witty right now
[19:57] <Teenr0cker> this explains his silence
[19:58] <Teenr0cker> he's out being witty as we speak
[19:58] <Teenr0cker> but he'll know how far he can go before he leaves the system
[19:58] <Teenr0cker> the system of wit, to be specific
[19:58] <Teenr0cker> the systems limit is in multiple bubbles
[19:58] <Teenr0cker> each of them partaining to your connection to my wit, and other's wit
[19:59] <Teenr0cker> mainly a computer with net access is another system
[19:59] <Teenr0cker> so in order to theoretically remain witty, he'd need a constant line to us
[19:59] <Fitz> Then through our wit we are effecting others on this Wit-network.
[19:59] <Teenr0cker> via cell phone, chat, or physically
[19:59] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[20:00] <Teenr0cker> Have you ever noticed the atmosphere in a net cafe is different
[20:00] <Teenr0cker> that's not the hemp or the hooka smoke
[20:00] <Teenr0cker> thats the concentration of wit from their portals
[20:00] <Teenr0cker> because we know that wit is accumulative
[20:01] <Teenr0cker> and that excess of wit obviously will affect the surroundings eventually
[20:01] <Teenr0cker> It all makes sense!
[20:01] <Ghoti> Uh-huh
[20:01] <Ghoti> A wit aura
[20:01] <Fitz> And if wit effects the sexiness of a physical world then those in the surroundings of say, a Wit-LAN, are the sexiest.
[20:02] <Teenr0cker> Indeed. Perhaps the reason people isolate the LAN players is because they fear being drawn in by the sexiness
[20:03] <Teenr0cker> the fellow lan attendees are perfectly fine
[20:03] <Teenr0cker> for their resistance is built upon such intense exposure
[20:03] <Fitz> Though I think the same can be said for Anti-Wit.
[20:03] <Teenr0cker> well...
[20:03] <Teenr0cker> it depends
[20:03] <Fitz> If you consider this:
[20:03] <Teenr0cker> on a mental level, no, there is no resistance
[20:04] <Ghoti> Well, I'm gonna go take a shower. Let's hope my final remaining wits don't get washed down the drain.
[20:04] <Fitz> If many users of LANs are nerds (commonly thought as UN-sexy), then there cannot be a concentration of wit, otherwise they would be sexy.
[20:05] <Teenr0cker> Silly Ghoti, you just gained all the wit you could possibly lose in a cleansing by being witty just then
[20:05] <Fitz> Therefore, certain networks, are infact anti-wit-networks. High concentrations of the substance known as fugly and anti-wit.
[20:05] <Teenr0cker> You have to understand, the biochemistry of wit is not a 2 way street
[20:06] <Teenr0cker> aka MTV
[20:06] <Teenr0cker> If you are witty, you are sexy
[20:06] <Teenr0cker> however, you don't have to be witty if you are sexy
[20:06] <Fitz> Ahh.
[20:06] <Fitz> Being witty = Sexy, Being sexy = Witty (NO!)
[20:07] <Teenr0cker> Case in point: Paris hilton
[20:07] <Teenr0cker> some would agree she has sex appeal
[20:07] <Teenr0cker> however, she has proven time and time again she is unwitty
[20:07] <Teenr0cker> and is actually the anti-thesis of wit
[20:07] <Teenr0cker> heres a quick lesson in bool, fitz
[20:08] <Teenr0cker> use != to mean cannot equal
[20:08] <Teenr0cker> its the same as doing =/=
[20:08] <WarV> Paris hilton isn't sexy =/
[20:08] <Teenr0cker> she has sex appea
[20:08] <Teenr0cker> she has boobs, nice skin
[20:08] <Fitz> Ahh, I was going to use that, but I forgot order and stuff.
[20:08] <Teenr0cker> and a face that doesn't make me cry
[20:09] <Fitz> Technically, if she is the opposite of wit, then if we convinced everybody in the world to stop being witty, she would surely disapear?
[20:09] * Sexyphalsion has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
[20:09] <Teenr0cker> sure, that might work
[20:09] <Teenr0cker> but we need wit
[20:09] <inari-chan> paris hilton is a disgusting bimbo crackwhore
[20:10] <inari-chan> i'm never flirting with you again if she's your idea of an appealing female
[20:10] <Fitz> If we really wanted to get rid of her.
[20:10] <Teenr0cker> its difficult to eliminate wit altogether
[20:10] <Fitz> Due to the Spark of wit.
[20:10] <Teenr0cker> hold up there
[20:10] <Teenr0cker> I don't find her sexy at all
[20:10] <Teenr0cker> however, America is a mass of dumb assholes that seems to love her
[20:10] <Fitz> <Teenr0cker> some would agree she has sex appeal
[20:10] <Teenr0cker> some
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> not all
[20:11] <Fitz> Yeah.
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> I am not on
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> one*
[20:11] <Fitz> That's what I was getting at.
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> excellent
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> oh, so yes....
[20:11] <Teenr0cker> like I was saying
[20:12] <Teenr0cker> two ways to undo paris via wit
[20:12] <Teenr0cker> lose all wit (and sexiness in the world)
[20:12] <Teenr0cker> or you can overwhelm her with wit
[20:12] <Teenr0cker> it seems so far that she acts like a wit-black-hole
[20:12] <Fitz> Or a "Complete Serve"
[20:13] <Fitz> Incidentally, what is wit measured in?
[20:13] <Teenr0cker> hmm
[20:14] <Teenr0cker> one could use measurements and comparisons
[20:14] <Teenr0cker> such as the change from a B-cup to a C-cup for those females with a wit growth
[20:14] <Teenr0cker> or the need for the next size in pants
[20:15] <Teenr0cker> http://www.mpogr.com/game.php?id=49 Do me a favor and vote for this game
[20:16] <Fitz> Hmm, then wit is divided into categories of cup and pant size.
[20:16] <Teenr0cker> it's gender-specific
[20:16] <Teenr0cker> theres also wit styles
[20:16] <Teenr0cker> your mom jokes can be exceptionally witty
[20:16] <Teenr0cker> punny wit is on the downward trend
[20:17] <Fitz> Though surely when the "retro" of wit is called for, Punny wit is good.
[20:17] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[20:17] <Teenr0cker> my teacher in comp sci is the pun master
[20:17] <Fitz> There is sarcastic wit, though often considered the lowest form, as in the closest to anti-wit.
[20:18] <Teenr0cker> Please dont' leave me in the darkroom with all these camera jokes
[20:18] <Teenr0cker> I shudder at the thought
[20:18] <Teenr0cker> So lets focus
[20:18] <Teenr0cker> he just strings them on and on
[20:19] <Fitz> Playing off a constant theme or using each as a point from which to take puns.
[20:19] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[20:20] <Teenr0cker> in fact, just by the mere mentioning of the various physics of wit has increased my supply of available wit
[20:21] <Fitz> Because surely an understanding of the form of wit gives you access to deeper uses of each form.
[20:22] <Fitz> In fact, if you perfectly understood the effect of wit on the world, you could manipulate the size of boobies everywhere.
[20:22] <Fitz> Life has a new purpose.
[20:23] <Teenr0cker> yes, I know
[20:23] <Teenr0cker> how do you think I live these days?
[20:23] <Teenr0cker> I amuse myself by watching a girls wit increase, and her chest expand just by sitting next to me
[20:23] <Teenr0cker> and the more jokes I say during a workout, the stronger I seem to be the next day
[20:24] <Teenr0cker> I did a 10 minute wall sit after a 5k run the other day
[20:24] <Teenr0cker> no prob
[20:25] <Fitz> Then everybody (excluding the anti-wits of course) will instinctively absorb wit on contact and it is automatically pulled into them.
[20:25] <Fitz> As apposed to say, you forcing your wit into them, as in, a push.
[20:26] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[20:26] <Teenr0cker> instrinsic effects are marvelous
[20:27] <Fitz> Hmm... you could play practical jokes on men in tight shorts. Embarressing them in public.
[20:27] <Fitz> Though of course you wouldn't look yourself, you'd watch other people watch.
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> yes
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> that increases your wit exponentially
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> and it makes everyone else witty
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> as they mock the man
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> but they might also find him incredibly sexy then
[20:28] <Teenr0cker> which is why you should wear loose pants often
[20:29] <Fitz> True.
[20:29] <Teenr0cker> never know when you might hit a high concentration
[20:29] <Fitz> It's also good for dickgirl detection.
[20:30] <Teenr0cker> obviously
[20:30] <Teenr0cker> but moxy could help you detect that one too
[20:31] <Fitz> Though technically because most would not find two genders in one sexy, surely the sexiness would conform to which ever gender is most appealing at the time?
[20:31] <Teenr0cker> that would be quite versatile
[20:31] <Fitz> The power of wit is truely amazing.
[20:31] <Teenr0cker> indeed
[20:31] <Teenr0cker> control wit and you control reality itself
[20:31] <Fitz> Yes.
[20:32] <Fitz> Though I am to go to sleep. So I shall have to cut (Using my razor sharp wit) this witty banter short.
[20:32] <Fitz> G'night.
[20:32] * Fitz has quit IRC (Quit: I worked out how to use the quit message function at last!)
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Postby Sage Of The Wise » Sat Jun 03, 2006 10:42 pm

IRC quotes. Not IRC essays. Quotes.


Seriously, does anyone plan on reading that?
And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
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Postby Squiggy » Sun Jun 04, 2006 12:03 am

I already did, It's actually rather entertaining.
Douglas Adams wrote:If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.
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Postby Fitz Tayo » Sun Jun 04, 2006 2:56 am

It IS over an hour of conversation, all about wit.
<@Jeramyu> videogames are art and I will buttsex anyone who disagrees
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Postby Telephalsion » Sun Jun 04, 2006 2:57 am

That was pure wit.
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