Spoiler Alert

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Spoiler Alert

Postby Impossible » Sun Jul 22, 2007 2:49 am

Norbert is a girl.
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Postby Teenr0cker » Sun Jul 22, 2007 3:19 am

I dont even know who the fuck that is, but I'm telling everyone that too.


Also, Snape revives dumbledore as a zombie and kills him again. This repeats for 57 pages, then is replaced by Slave and Master sessions between Ron and Harry and Hedwig, the owl.
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Postby Greatchickenman » Sun Jul 22, 2007 11:26 am

Also:

* Voldemort kills Burbage on pg. 12

* A Death Eater kills Hedwig on pg. 56

* Mad-Eye is shot in the face with a killing curse and falls off his broom, confirmed dead on pg. 78

* Scrimgeour is confirmed dead on pg. 159

* Wormtail's own silver hand kills him on pg. 471

* Dobby gets shanked on pg. 476

* Snape gets bitten on the neck by Nagini, dies on pg. 658
o Snape killed but did not pwn Dumbledore in the last book on Dumbledore's request, to keep Voldemort from using the power of the Elder Wand.
+ Draco pwned Dumbledore before Snape could, so the power of the Elder Wand went to Draco, not Snape.
# Harry pwned Draco, so the power went to him. But Voldemort thought Snape had pwned Dumbledore before Voldemort killed and pwned Snape so he thought he had access to the Elder Wand but he was wrong!

* Snape was a genuine good guy and loyal to Dumbledore, Harry, and Harry's mother Lily (who he wanted to fuck) the entire time!

* Fred Weasley gets blown up, dies on pg. 637

* HARRY IS KILLED by Voldemort on pg. 704
o Hangs out with Dumbledore, comes back to life on pg. 724

* Voldemort's own spell backfires on him, making him an unintentional an hero on pg. 744

* Tonks, Lupin, and Colin Creevy have their deaths confirmed on pg. 745

LULZ everybody dies!
LULZ everybody dies!

19 years after the events in the book:

*Ron has married Hermione, their two children are named Rose and Hugo

*Harry has married Ginny, their three children are named Lily, James, and Albus Severus.

* Draco Malfoy has a son named Scorpius and is going bald

The epilogue shows all of the children boarding the train for Hogwarts together.

The final lines of the book are:

* "The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years. All was well."
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Postby Forerunner » Sun Jul 22, 2007 11:53 pm

Eh it wasn't that great. But definitely good enough to be worth reading other than just to finish the series.

She wrapped it all up very well, considering it's a 7 book series with potential to have been much longer, the only think I didn't really like was that in order to make us feel better about the people who did die she seemed to drop the subject quickly after it happened. Not enough honour to the fallen in my opinion, but other than that, it was good.
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Postby Sling » Mon Jul 23, 2007 3:31 am

Greatchickenman wrote:Also:

* Voldemort kills Burbage on pg. 12

* A Death Eater kills Hedwig on pg. 56

* Mad-Eye is shot in the face with a killing curse and falls off his broom, confirmed dead on pg. 78

* Scrimgeour is confirmed dead on pg. 159

* Wormtail's own silver hand kills him on pg. 471

* Dobby gets shanked on pg. 476

* Snape gets bitten on the neck by Nagini, dies on pg. 658
o Snape killed but did not pwn Dumbledore in the last book on Dumbledore's request, to keep Voldemort from using the power of the Elder Wand.
+ Draco pwned Dumbledore before Snape could, so the power of the Elder Wand went to Draco, not Snape.
# Harry pwned Draco, so the power went to him. But Voldemort thought Snape had pwned Dumbledore before Voldemort killed and pwned Snape so he thought he had access to the Elder Wand but he was wrong!

* Snape was a genuine good guy and loyal to Dumbledore, Harry, and Harry's mother Lily (who he wanted to fuck) the entire time!

* Fred Weasley gets blown up, dies on pg. 637

* HARRY IS KILLED by Voldemort on pg. 704
o Hangs out with Dumbledore, comes back to life on pg. 724

* Voldemort's own spell backfires on him, making him an unintentional an hero on pg. 744

* Tonks, Lupin, and Colin Creevy have their deaths confirmed on pg. 745

LULZ everybody dies!
LULZ everybody dies!

19 years after the events in the book:

*Ron has married Hermione, their two children are named Rose and Hugo

*Harry has married Ginny, their three children are named Lily, James, and Albus Severus.

* Draco Malfoy has a son named Scorpius and is going bald

The epilogue shows all of the children boarding the train for Hogwarts together.

The final lines of the book are:

* "The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years. All was well."
You are a king among men, now, time to piss off some fans...
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Postby Impossible » Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:59 am

Don't be a dick. I tell everyone that Norbert is a girl because it's not a real spoiler (although it IS true) and it doesn't matter. Actually ruining the book for people just makes you an asshole.

Deathly Hallows was awesome, except the epilogue. Possibly the most cliche thing I've ever read.
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Postby EmperorJeramyu » Mon Jul 23, 2007 11:01 am

Impossible wrote:Don't be a dick. I tell everyone that Norbert is a girl because it's not a real spoiler (although it IS true) and it doesn't matter. Actually ruining the book for people just makes you an asshole.

I see no problem there. In fact, I condone such actions, merely because pissing off fanboys/fangirls is immensely gratifying.
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Postby Telephalsion » Mon Jul 23, 2007 12:41 pm

I shall kill anyone who tells me anything... or rather, I shall leave this place and return once I have finished the book.

I have to say though, the front page sucked ass.
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Postby Sling » Mon Jul 23, 2007 12:56 pm

Harry Potter is a children's book that rips of a ton of other fantasy novels. This doesn't bother me that much. What bothers me is the way people worship the HP franchise and the ground JK Rowling walks upon as if it were new or innovative. I may get the 6th and 7th book but it's not really that big a deal and I don't care that I know how it ends etc.
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Postby Sage Of The Wise » Tue Jul 24, 2007 2:59 pm

Deathly Hallows was awesome, except the epilogue. Possibly the most cliche thing I've ever read.

I was thinking the same thing.

That and Albus Severus is the worst name ever. Harry ruins the kids life just the reference two people in one name.
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Postby Greatchickenman » Tue Jul 24, 2007 8:52 pm

Sage Of The Wise wrote:
Deathly Hallows was awesome, except the epilogue. Possibly the most cliche thing I've ever read.

I was thinking the same thing.

That and Albus Severus is the worst name ever. Harry ruins the kids life just the reference two people in one name.


When I saw that epilogue about 2 weeks ago I was sure that it was some poorly written fanfic or some illiterate from the church of england trying to spoil the book. The fact that it's the real thing makes it all the more pathetic.
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Postby Impossible » Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:30 am

EmperorJeramyu wrote:
Impossible wrote:Don't be a dick. I tell everyone that Norbert is a girl because it's not a real spoiler (although it IS true) and it doesn't matter. Actually ruining the book for people just makes you an asshole.

I see no problem there. In fact, I condone such actions, merely because pissing off fanboys/fangirls is immensely gratifying.


Except you also piss off ordinary people who are just trying to enjoy a book. Would you like it if someone had spoiled The Way for you?
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Postby Iorek » Wed Jul 25, 2007 3:49 am

Impossible wrote:
EmperorJeramyu wrote:
Impossible wrote:Don't be a dick. I tell everyone that Norbert is a girl because it's not a real spoiler (although it IS true) and it doesn't matter. Actually ruining the book for people just makes you an asshole.

I see no problem there. In fact, I condone such actions, merely because pissing off fanboys/fangirls is immensely gratifying.


Except you also piss off ordinary people who are just trying to enjoy a book. Would you like it if someone had spoiled The Way for you?


If the book is great, let it draw you away from the computer--If you don't want any spoilers, just chill out with non-internet Harry-Potter-is-okay friends.
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Postby Impossible » Wed Jul 25, 2007 6:41 am

Because, of course, there's no world outside of the Internet that isn't so easily avoidable. Good thing we don't have one of those.

And people were spoiling the book before it was even out and before anyone COULD just read it themselves.
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Postby Sling » Wed Jul 25, 2007 7:32 am

Impossible wrote:Would you like it if someone had spoiled The Way for you?
Hell yeah. I ask people how things end all the time, and they never tell me... Bastards.
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