Revival of the IRC Quotes

[Ghoti]

It was just too awesome not to post.

[Greatchickenman]

An intelligent faux conversation about wit, followed by an endless slew of insulting war, followed by some more philosophy and boobies.

I didn't read the rest, lest I die of old age, but i'm pretty sure it's just as awesome.

[Strayed Wanderer]

His basis for that statement was totally taken out of context. Yes, you did put the quote up, but you only used that one line as your arguement. Strayed stated he refuses to please homosexual men and heterosexual women for the same reason I would turn down a MMF 3-some...In our own world, I think the wang we should be most comfortable being around is our own...the one wang to rule them all, each man his own. Last I checked, girls like the wang, so it only seems natural that he'd not want to please them by drawing a lot of wangs, mainly because he doesn't care to make a deck full of gay-oriented cards. In fact, he proves his hetrosexuality because he disdains from serving women, thus implying he'd rather focus on his interests, which is obviously the pussy. If I heard a guy say "I want to draw a wang to appeal to girls mainly", I'd tell them they're a fag. Guys should obviously want to please themselves before pleasing anyone else (self-centered? Strayed? Yup), so his arguement sounds right. Get what I mean?

... simple sentences please. But yes, that sounds about right.

[TeppicTheBloodLyn]

[19:41] <inari-chan> they're like, the fourth and fifth elements to rock paper scissors.
[19:41] <Fitz> <Sexual Innuendo>
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Gasp!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Fifth element!
[19:41] <Fitz> Love?
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> No!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Bewbs!
[19:41] <Fitz> Wit?
[19:41] <Fitz> Oh..
[19:41] <Fitz> Cool!
[19:41] <Teenr0cker> Wit is the 6th

Everyone knows the fifth element is the element of surprise.

[War]

More witty then before.

[«»] inari-chan [ ~Dresden@cpe-065-188-019-017.sc.res.rr.com ] has joined #theway
<Teppic> Probably
[02.36.29 PM] * Teppic dances naked
<Fitz> ...
<Fitz> But it's not naked time yet!
<Fitz> Heathen.
<Teppic> Teppic the allmighty desides for himself when his own naked time is!
[02.50.02 PM] * Teppic is allmighty.
[02.52.23 PM] * Teppic can alter the world with his amazing wit.
[03.00.47 PM] * WarV reminds Teppic that he is the anit-wit so his wit is usless here.
<Fitz> It's true.
[03.07.55 PM] * Teppic 's degree of wit is so large that it cancels out War's anti-wit by far more that the amout needed to alter the world.
<Fitz> Don't be silly. Only one force in the world has the wit equivalent to War's anti-wit.
<Teppic> That's me.
<Fitz> Even if that were true, which it is not, it would merely mean that you cancel out War's anti-wit without adding extra wit.
<Fitz> Seems somebody doesn't know the Laws of Wit.
<Teppic> I am the redeemer. I am the entity who posseses such a large amount of wit that the laws of wit break down, just like the laws of physics fall apart when the higgs field collapses at high energy.
<WarV> Yes yes you must listen to fitz for he is a Witologist
<Fitz> Or you're lying.
<Fitz> You haven't read the mIRC quotes recently.
<Teppic> I have. The laws of with are substained by the Tele-field, just as the laws of physics are substained by the Higgs field. Under the pressure my wit is exerting on spacetime, the Tele-field falls apart.
<Teppic> Known as Porter's theorem of badassness.
<Fitz> Yeah... that's just a lie.
<Teppic> Now. That's Quantum Wit Theory.
<Teppic> No*
<Fitz> Tele doesn't sustain the wit. Nothing does, the wit-spark is sustained by each individual.
<Fitz> When somebody dies, their wit goes.
<Fitz> And even if such field were to exist, then there would be no force witty enough to destroy it without anouther force with equal anti-wit.
<Teppic> But the Tele-field allows each indiviual to produce a wit aura. Without it, it would not be able to be used by the individual, and would flaot around freely untill it met war and was destroyed.
<Fitz> Thus creating a balance, and sustaining this "field" or yours.
<Teppic> Indeed, but once they are isolated, parts of the field would collapse.
<Fitz> Such a field would imply that nobody before or after Tele's life is witty, which is stupid.
<Fitz> Why would that happen. There would still be a balance.
<Teppic> Which is why I can alter the world when my neighbour is not around.
<Fitz> The Wit balance is universal, not limited to the plane of #theway.<Teppic> But they would not affect eachother due to the clinical isolation. Thus, local effects would happen. As would there be similar anti-effects around the anti.wit.
<Teppic> anti-wit.*
<Fitz> That is illogical, it is impossible to be isolated from the Wit Balance.
<Fitz> And if they were isolated, their wit/anti-wit would still have their own equal effect on the physical world, if it does effect the world.
<Fitz> And if they were removed from the equation, then there would simply be less wit/anti-wit in the world. But the Balance of Wit would still exist.
<Fitz> It is simple, why should anything be excluded from the Wit Balance as to be able to exert a personalised effect on the physical world.
<Teppic> I does effect the isolated portion of the world. Anyway, if the Tele-field broke down, the matter of balance would no longer be a question, since the laws of wit can no longer be applied.
<Teppic> Therefore....
[03.39.09 PM] * Teppic dances naked.
<Fitz> What isolated portion.
<Fitz> There is no way to isolate wit.
<Teppic> I did.
<Fitz> You argument is foundless and you clearly illustrate your ignorance of the wit.
<Teppic> My naked dancing is proof.
<Fitz> Naked Dancing is not dependent on wit.
<Fitz> Penis and breast size, aka sexiness is automatically raised, if you wit is raise.
<Fitz> With an opposite effect for the greater anti-wit.
<Teppic> But I have broke the law of naked time, since I am all powerfull due to my amazing with which renderes the Tele-field useless.
<Fitz> Naked Time is not determined by wit...
<Fitz> Why would it be?
<Fitz> It's determined by the Naked Schedule. Which is a completely differant thing.
<Teppic> It is not, but the power to break it is deriven from the wit.
<Fitz> Why?
<Fitz> That is silly.
<Teppic> Because it makes me allpowerfull.
<Fitz> No it doesn't.
<Fitz> If you really were that witty, you'd just have a huge cock.
<Fitz> That's all.
<Fitz> You'd also grant with through the Wit Aura to those surrounding you.
<Teppic> But once the Tele-field had broken down, you wouldn't be able to deduce the atributes of wit anymore.
<Teppic> Anyway, I do have a big cock.
<Fitz> But then again.
<Fitz> The Tele-Field is made up by you.
<Fitz> So who would know.
<Teppic> That does make it not true.
<Teppic> doesn't*<Fitz> Yes it does.
<Fitz> It is a completely foundless statement with not proof!
<Teppic> It is based on naked dancing and wit.
<Fitz> If there were some sort of Wit-Field, it would be caused by a timeless object that is not perishable.
<Teppic> That's Tele.
<Fitz> Tele is perishable.
<Teppic> Prove it.
<Fitz> Prove he's not.
<WarV> Even if you could do such a thing. Wit could not be used in such a way. If you tried to bend wit it would just break. You see wit can be created and destoried.
<Teppic> I know.
<Teppic> Under the Telefield which allows it to form a wit aura.
<Fitz> Also the fact there was wit prior to Tele's existance means that it is quite obviously not him.
<Teppic> Tele is ethernal, if not in body.
<Fitz> And the fact wit does not effect Naked Time in anyway also renders your "proof" useless.
<WarV> Tele couldn't be the timeless object. It would have to be Zelbak
<Teppic> Tele is a travelling jester spirit, the form we know is just the current keeper of the hat.
<Fitz> And if you WERE witty enough to break this field that quite obviously is non-existant.
<Fitz> You would quite easily be able to prove your wit through a series of hilarious quips that both destroy my argument and pride.
<Fitz> Which hasn't been happening.
<Fitz> The way you assume you have isolated the one with equal anti-wit to yourself, which isn't enough to break this "field" anyway, is groundless as that is impossible.
<Teppic> How would you know? Once the wit auras are no longer able to exist you would no longer be able to tell the atributes of wit. For all you know I could be very witty right now.
<Teppic> And I do in fact have a large cock, like I stated before.
<WarV> You have more anit-wit then me -_-
<Fitz> Yes, but Being Witty=Sexy. Being sexy however =/= being witty.
<Fitz> And there's the fact that you're not being witty.
<Teppic> Like I said, you wouldn't be able to tell, would you?
<Teppic> Anyway, my point is that I can defy naked time.
<Fitz> Which has nothing to do with wit anyway...
<Fitz> What you have...
<Teppic> My wit, without the Tele field, grants me the power to swim to the bottom of the sea and fight with squid in mortal combat, AND defy naked time.
<Fitz> Is the amazing ability to ignore a statement such as "Naked time is at 3:15, every monday".
<Fitz> Well, seeing as there is no evidence for any Wit Field, yet alone one generated by Tele, that's stupid.<Fitz> And the whole swimming to the bottom of the sea is stupid.
<Fitz> Wit effects sexiness and sexiness alone.
<Teppic> As long as they are forced to form an aura.
<WarV> Like I said he is suffing from anit-wit depression.
<Fitz> While it has the potential to effect our internal thoughts and such. The only the effect on the physical world it has is sexiness.
<Teppic> If there is no Tele-field, then how do you exlpain the auras?
<WarV> and even then that is because it tells your body to make them that way
<Fitz> The aura is a naturally occuring thing.
<WarV> so it has no real effect on the physical world
<Teppic> How does it occur?
<Fitz> The wit inside somebody generates its own aura which is dependent on its size.
<Teppic> Ah. I see.
<Fitz> Such as light. A light from a match generates less light than the sun, y'dig?
<Teppic> I guess I was wrong all along, then.
<Fitz> Yes.
<Teppic> No worries.
<Fitz> Tch. Voodoo Wit hippees.
[03.56.00 PM] * Teppic naked dances anyway.
<Fitz> 3:15 every monday!
<WarV> or when you take a shower.
<Fitz> Or one of the various other loopholes that we all use to get naked.
<Teppic> But I can still break the rules, even if the Tele-field was just a rouse the get some insurance money.
<Fitz> Feel free to break the Naked Schedule, just don't blame me when Naked Law Ninja attack you.

[Fitz Tayo]

The Laws of Wit MUST be obeyed!

[Aegis]

[16:47] <Jeramyu> ugh
[16:47] <Jeramyu> I was going for a walk
[16:47] <Jeramyu> and I walked by a sewage sucking truck thingy
[16:47] <Jeramyu> nasty
[16:48] <Jeramyu> those always ruin a good walk
[16:48] <Aegis> Ick.
[16:48] <Ghoti> Mmmhmmm
[16:49] <Ghoti> You still interested in other songs by them?
[16:49] <Aegis> At least it was not a sewage spewing truck


Yes, I know I'm quoting my own joke. But Ghoti seemed to think it was funny.

[Greatchickenman]

Yeah, that joke really wasn't funny.

[Aegis]

Yeah, that joke really wasn't funny.

In hindsight, I agree.

[Sage Of The Wise]

Ghoti is definatly not a standard you should be rating jokes on.

[Teenr0cker]

He found it amusing to tell me I'm his "Big red firetruck" in his station. That's not exactly in the standard spectrum of compliments I get.

[Strayed Wanderer]

Read at your own risk, seriously. The following quote includes: Diarrhea, Sperm, Masturbation, Rape

<Strayed> GHOTI!
<Jeramyu> PIEZ
<Strayed> JERRY!
<Jeramyu> STAYED
<Strayed> I'm not sure if I have anything to say to you.
<Strayed> Been bleeding much?
<Strayed> any inexplicable eye injuries?
<Strayed> Brain tumors?
<Jeramyu> explosive diarrhea
<Strayed> I had the bloody kind a few days ago.
<Strayed> I made the mistake of going out for dinner too.
<Jeramyu> ouch
<Jeramyu> I totally messed up a walmart bathroom with mine
<Strayed> I don't think I've ever used a walmart bathroom.
<Jeramyu> this one was just cleaned. the one-eyed autistic 80 year old with an oxygen tank had made everything sparkling fresh.
<Jeramyu> but I fixed that.
<Strayed> I think I avoid walmarts all together actually...
<Jeramyu> I try.
<Jeramyu> but I NEEDED to shit.
<Jeramyu> I had already almost dropped a deuce in my pants.
<Strayed> I ruined a perfectly good pair of boxers.
<Jeramyu> yeah, I did that when I had food poisoning
<Strayed> Actually, I wouldn't really call any of them perfectly good... I think they all smell like urine.
<Jeramyu> well that's almost a given.
<Jeramyu> see, this is why being a man rules. this conversation could've never taken place with a woman involved.
<Strayed> Yeah, women are such babies about diarrhea.
<Strayed> Ever think your room smells like anal-loads of sperm but you are far too used to it to tell?
<Jeramyu> Yeah, I was complaining about it earlier: No matter how cool a chick seems, she always runs off when you try and tell diarrhea stories.
<Jeramyu> oh
<Jeramyu> hmmm
<Jeramyu> I dunno, does sperm really smell?
<Strayed> ...
<Strayed> Dude. It smells.
<Jeramyu> I know there's crotch odor, but that probably wouldn't matter unless you drag your chode across the floor.
<Jeramyu> ...which isn't completely out of the question, but...
<Strayed> ...
<Strayed> Dude, it has a smell.
<Strayed> A lingering smell.
<Strayed> Men must get used to it too fast...
<Jeramyu> maybe that's it
<Strayed> We might need a woman to figure this one out.
<Jeramyu> maybe I should sniff my garbage can at the end of the week
<Jeramyu> it's always like 90% kleenex anyway
<Strayed> Just sniff the kleenex.
<Jeramyu> that might not be enough
<Strayed> It usually is.
<Jeramyu> everyone always says jizz vanishes after a couple hours, but I dunno...
<Strayed> The liquid does.
<Strayed> The shit inside it, no.
<Jeramyu> actually, my main qualm is the "two minute after" jizz
<Jeramyu> the stuff that drips out after you've changed valves
<Strayed> So that isn't just me?
<Jeramyu> nah
<Jeramyu> there's always leftovers
<Strayed> leftovers I get, but that stuff always just seems to show up a few minutes later.
<Strayed> It's not like it was sitting inside.
<Jeramyu> these days I just piss as fast as possible after I'm done, since it clears the tube
<Strayed> I piss at a ninety degree angle afterwards...
<Strayed> like, literally.
<Jeramyu> wow.
<Jeramyu> that's impressive.
<Strayed> Yeah, I thought so the first time too.
<Jeramyu> I can get maybe 70 or 75 at best.
<Strayed> Now it's just inconvenient.
<Jeramyu> yeah, I suppose that's true.
<Jeramyu> especially if you're sitting on a toilet
<Strayed> standing is worse, it hits the freakin walls.
<Jeramyu> I know.
<Strayed> which happened a few times when I wasn't paying attention.
<Strayed> sitting, you get that psychotic post-masturbation backsplash... but at least you don't have to clean up.
<Jeramyu> actually, a couple days ago I achieved my life's goal of crapping and jizzing at the same time.
<Strayed> ...
<Jeramyu> it actually works wonders on constipation
<Strayed> I've farted...
<Jeramyu> yeah, farting tends to happen a lot
<Strayed> Coughed too... that one never goes well.
<Jeramyu> I think I sneezed once
<Jeramyu> that kinda hurts
<Strayed> I think I actually got a leg cramp from that once.
<Strayed> and then I complained about it on here.
<Jeramyu> nice
<Jeramyu> I think I actually fell off of my computer chair since I was leaning too far.
<Jeramyu> which was weird, because I started laughing too
<Jeramyu> too much vibrating
<Strayed> ... Vibrating?
<Jeramyu> yeah, lauhging, jizzing, falling and hurting
<Strayed> That stuff generally doesn't make me vibrate.
<Jeramyu> try taking your hands off when it's going
<Jeramyu> I gurantee it will be shaking in every which direction
<Jeramyu> OK
<Jeramyu> I can't keep this up
<Jeramyu> if this was a contest, you win.
<Strayed> Haha.
<Strayed> In that case, yes it was a contest.
<Strayed> And I'm pretty sure I could never lose. I have quite a few masturbation stories, some of which you just aren't ready for.
<Jeramyu> hmmmm, probably, I don't really have any wacky stories
<Jeramyu> except when I just decided to "fuck it and just hit the nearest wall"
<Jeramyu> that was a mess.
<Strayed> That one generally results in a shot over my head if I'm backed up... not pretty.
<Strayed> I'm actually surprised Ghoti didn't show up in the middle of that.
<Ghoti> Sorry.
<Jeramyu> Yeah, I was wondering where he was.
<Jeramyu> I know you can't resist a discussion of semen.
<Ghoti> I would have, but...
<Ghoti> OH, I dunno.
<Ghoti> I guess I'm just tired.
<Strayed> That's not an excuse.
<Ghoti> -_-zzz
<Strayed> Don't make me rape you.
<Ghoti> OH, would you?!?!
<Strayed> I would, but I don't have any condoms and fecal matter causes extreme penile pain for me.
<Ghoti> Ah crap, I don't have my wits about me since I'm so tired
<Ghoti> I'm out.
* Ghoti has quit IRC (Quit: I'll be back. Probably.)
<Strayed> Was that a contest too?
<Strayed> If so, I think I won again.

[Fitz Tayo]

That is what IRC quotes is all about.

[Teenr0cker]

Yes, Strayed wins again.

[Teenr0cker]

Sucks to be Teppic


* Teppic (~Teppic@ti111210a080-5515.bb.online.no) has joined #theway
Teppic And that is why you fail.
* Teppic has quit (Quit: )
Teenr0cker well if I'm doofcake, then you're feather ball
Teenr0cker do you think we should have told him we were active
Teenr0cker ?
Strayed Nah.
Strayed He'd just ruin everything.